According to SG, I snore. Since I haven’t recorded myself to see if this is true, I can’t totally refute his claim but I am rather irritated that I would engage in such unladylike snufflings.
It’s becoming a problem. Either SG spends most of the night poking me, which means I get no sleep, or he goes to sleep on the sofa, which means I feel guilty (in both of these scenarios, SG still gets no sleep). Two adults + lack of sleep = grumpy adults, so this isn’t a sustainable situation.
I’ve tried sleeping in different positions; he claims it doesn’t matter how I’m situated. I’ve tried the oh-so-sexy strips; he claims they don’t help. I’ve tried going to bed hours after SG so he’s deeply asleep; he claims he wakes up around 3:00 anyway and can’t get back to sleep because of the noise. He’s tried sleeping with his headphones; evidently, they don’t help.
And so, now, I’m so paranoid, I can barely sleep when he’s beside me, which means I sleep lightly through most of the night and fall into a deep sleep when he leaves in the morning – and that means I get an even later start than I usually would.
SG doesn’t really help my paranoia, either, given the fairly typical conversation we have in the wee hours:
[poke, poke, poke]
SG: You’re snoring.
Me: No, I’m not.
SG: Yes, you are.
Me: I’m wide awake since the last time you poked me, I think I’d know if I was snoring.
SG: You just think you’re awake but you’re really asleep. And you’re snoring.
Me: I think I know when I’m awake and when I’m asleep. And I don’t hear anything.
SG: Well, I hear it, and even if you’re not loud, you’re rhythmic.
Me: That’s called breathing.
He’s ordered some earplugs. If they don’t help, I may be spending the rest of my sabbatical back in PRU City.